I thought that everything was smooth sailing.
I thought that I had everything I wanted.
Far from where I lived was a family that loved me but I had my own family that was growing, granted it was consisted of animals.
I did have everything I wanted..and seeing Nicholas brought memories I had forgotten.
Hehad returned and with him were three years of inside jokes, helpingeach other on math, and a crush that was so powerful I feared it waslove back then.
But he had left and I had gotten over him.
Now hewas back and I wasn't sure if the crush ever went away but I was gonnamake sure it could blossom again. I wanted to feel his lips on minebefore he would have to leave, depart from me once again.
It hadbeen years since I had saw a friend from high school, and I was alsohungry to have a friend who shared the stress of school once again.
I was determined to feel him hold me.
..How could I have been so stupid? Why was I so willing to have him?
I wish I could take it all back, I wish I had listened to Jekyll and declined Nicholas's offer.
God I'm so stupid!
I smack my head against the wall, pain erupting immediately. I didn't care, I wanted to be awake from this nightmare.
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Iwas getting ready the next night. I had spent almost the whole day fromwhen I woke up, during work, and driving home afterwards excited to seeNicholas. We had so much to talk about, so much to catch up, so manyquestions that were left unanswered. We were adults now, he could tellme why he had to leave and what he had been up to all these years. Iconsidered then that this might be a date so I wanted to look good forhim, but not too exquisite. I didn't want to overload and scare himaway, he may have different notions.
Either way, the rest ofthe afternoon I had finished my tasks on the farm, feeding the chickenswith their pebbles, making sure the rescued rabbits had gottenaffection and were well protected in the barn, their bowls filled withoats as well as some vegetables. The four horses I was caring for,including Jekyll, had already had their romp in the pasture while I wasaway at work. They were cooled as their pumping muscles slowed and allwas calm. I left them with some bales of hey to munch on as I shut andlocked the stable door, ensuring their protection. I then went backinto my house and prepared myself.
After prepping myself, I wentto my car and slid into the driver's seat. I glanced one more time therear view mirror, my hazel eyes outlined with a gray liner sketchedcarefully around my eyes. My dark blonde hair I curled in slightringlets.I kept my outfit casual wearing only a dark blue shirt with myonly pair of jeans with no holes in them. I inserted my keys into theignition and let the car roar to life. Switching it into reverse, Irolled onto the road and headed for town.
I came briskly to thediner and I saw Nicholas there, waiting at a booth. I got out of mycar, he saw my through the window. He waved at me as I felt my cheekscurl into a smile. I met him inside, leaving my footprints in the snowbehind me. I went inside feeling the warmth of the restaurant instantlywrap around my face. I went towards where Nicholas was sitting and tookthe seat across from him. For the next hour we ate, laughed, and spokeof memories past. We conversed for what felt like the rest of the nightand suddenly I wanted to show him my farm, of my wonderful animals, hisblue eyes showed earnest and flashed with a twinge of eagerness. Aftereating and Nicholas insisting he pay the bill, we hopped in my car andI drove us to my house.
The night was progressing, a beautifulhalf moon looming over us at it shone across the fields of my home.Nicholas gave me compliments of how the farm looked, I showed him myhorses and the rest of the animals who were slumbering in theirdesignated shelters. I then invited him inside asking him if he wasthirsty, after saying that he was we headed for my kitchen. My tworottweilers, Dante and Virgil, named after my favorite video game,sniffed at him and then headed upstairs. I thought it was odd of thembecause they were usually welcoming and jumping all over anyone whowalked through my door but I shrugged, they may tired from rompingaround the farm all day. I opened the fridge and announced what I had.
"Let's see...." I said pondering and peering inside the fridge. "I have water, milk, lemonade, some soda...oh and some liquor."
Nicholas chuckled behind me. "You? And alcohol? I never thought I'd live to see the day."
I shrugged, pulling out a bottle. "I don't drink very much of it, just on rare occasions to calm me down."
"Doyou need to calm down tonight?" he asked smirking, eyes twinkling. Ilooked over him again and realized Nicholas, although the boy I knew inhigh school, wasn't a boy anymore. He stood in front of me as a man.
I grinned catching his implication. "After getting riled up to see you today I could use a drink. Want some?"
"Ohyeah, I'm wasn't a good student like you were. I liked my drinks." Helaughed as I handed him one, taking it gently from my hand.
Igiggled as I opened the top, taking a swig and leading him into theliving room. I flipped on the television and gestured him to sitanywhere he'd like. He took the recliner and I gawked at him.
"Oi," I said, "that's my spot! You can sit anywhere except for there."
"Whydon't we share it?" And then before I could register I should step awayhe took me by the legs, swinging me to sit on his lap. "There!"
"Hahaha!" I took another drink.
Wedrank for a while letting the television play whatever infomercial wasplaying as we talked some more, I had already had two bottles and wasquite tipsy, Nicholas was on his second too and was on the same levelas me.
"Hehe, thought you weren't a lightweight," I pointed out.
"I do what I want," he snickered, cheeks rosy.
Nicholaswas warm I noticed as I curled up on his lap, resting my head on hisshoulder. This wasn't like me but I had been known to get quite lovablewhen influenced and also it was Nicholas, I had nothing to fear fromhim.
After a while, our topics transitioned to high schoolcrushes and relationships. I told him that after he moved Adam and Iwent out but it didn't last so we broke up, since then we haven't spoketo each other.
At first Nicolas was shocked that the both of us dated and was puzzled that Adam up and left me.
"That doesn't make sense--the two of you were so close...right?" he asked.
I rose my shoulders and let them fall. "I thought so but apparently he didn't."
"I'm sorry, Ebs."
I waved it off. "Eh I'm over it. I got my animals and I'm okay! As long as theirs eggnog in the world I think I'll survive."
We laughed and then it got quiet. I blushed but I was tipsy so I hoped Nicholas wouldn't take me too seriously.
"Y-you wanna know the reason why it didn't work between Adam and me?" I asked the man who's lap I sat on.
"Shoot." He took another drink.
"Adamhad 'loved' me for a long time but not once did I ever think of himlike that. I felt bad when he asked me out and I got depressed. Henoticed and asked me why..."
Nicholas waited patiently, the blue eyes dimming and focused on only what I had to say--like I was important.
"Itold him I didn't think of him like that and wanted to make him happy,so I went out with him to see him smile and that all along I had likedsomeone else at that time..He felt like I strung him along, that's whyhe broke all connections to me. I don't blame him, it was pretty meanof me."
"Who was it that you liked?" questioned Nicholas, voice deep yet slurring a little.
Iwas overcome by his appearance, how manly and adult he had grown into,how his face was understanding and patient, how ever since I was ateenager his pink lips had plagued me to meet them.
Before I knew itI felt a warm presence on me, breathing into my face and dizzying mymind. I was overwhelmed and felt myself give into falling into a deepsleep and pass out. When my consciousness told me that I had kissedNicholas I was elated, my heavy chest flying within itself, performingconstant flips in excitement. Nicholas met me halfway and replied withhis own lips, our mouths parting and letting out tongues dancetogether. I held his face, holding him close sitting on his lap still.He wrapped around my waist drawing me closer, pressing our bodiestogether.
We pulled away slowly and gazed at each other.
"You," I answered his question.
He groaned at pressed me to the floor, I lied on my back arching my neck letting him kiss me all over.
"Can I...?" he whimpered.
"Yes...yes..." I allowed. I knew what he wanted and realized I needed it.
We kissed and rolled on the floor tangled together as he took me away.
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I should've known from the eagerness in his eyes that all he wanted to bring me was trouble.
To Be Continued...